Firstly, I’d like to confess to blatantly taking a question off a Facebook page that was not meant for me – as you can tell by the picture!
While I’ve written to the person, and thankfully they were open to hearing my views, it just so happens to be the kind of issue that I’ve been working on for a while. This person is quite right in being concerned and they have all my sympathy – how does one maintain relationships when there’s a clash with science and religion, and it’s your family?
There’s also a few recent events which coincide with this case. I interviewed Daniel Loxton on the issues some atheists had with his book (Token Skeptic #12 – On Science and Atheism – Interview with Daniel Loxton). In addition, I recently learned that a very good friend of mine has got at least one publishing house very interested in printing his science and skepticism book – which has a target audience of young adults. What if people who try to promote his book come across similar conflicts?
I’ve been writing about skeptical books for kids for… well, if you look at the first Skeptical Books for Children I wrote, you’ll see that it’s dated February, 2008.
Since then, I’ve written:
- Skeptical Books for Children – Part Two
- Skeptical Books for Children – Part Three
- Skeptical Books for Children – Part Four
- (and in response to a question from the radio show Skeptically Speaking) Skeptical Books For Children – Part Five.
In addition, there’s a segue into gender and literacy skills, with Mind The Gap, focusing on reading strategies.
Has much changed since I wrote those posts? Not really, I’d say. There are still people who are wanting to find good books for children and promote scientific literacy. I even ended up co-presenting at Dragon*Con on the topic of gender and science literacy, as it’s is another facet that intrigues me.
What I have argued in the blog-posts I’ve made on ‘Skeptical Books for Children’ is that it is better to address general science literacy and promote overall concepts – rather than directly challenge head-on, topics that are bound to cause debates. In the end, I think the goal should be promoting thinking, first and foremost.
What follows is a transcript of what Warren Bonett, in the most recent Skeptic Zone podcast, suggested – you can hear it in Episode #84 of our show! Warren is the proprietor of the Embiggen Books Bookshop in Noosaville, Queensland, in the north-east of Australia. The bookshop is devoted to promoting rationalism and science:
Kylie: I’ve recently read on Facebook how an uncle was criticised for giving Daniel Loxton’s ‘Evolution’ book to his nieces. Do you have any advice on how to handle situations like that, when people know that there’s going to be opposition when promoting a book, or discover it inadvertently?
Warren: This is something I have come across from time to time, and there’s no one simple ‘book’ or guide to give to people that will handle all the situations. Everyone has their own kind of tentativeness about it. I’d suggest starting with things that are more ‘off-topic’ – stay general? Stay with things that are to do with critical thinking, start with the basics. Don’t just start with subjects such as evolution, as that can open up a lot of other things at the same time, and that will prevent any critical engagement with the subject at all. I would tend to start with just thought, just thinking – Phillip Cam’s books, for example, or Dr Karl Kruszelnicki’s. And those at the Skeptics conference would also remember Peter Macinnis who has written some great books for piquing people’s interest in the world around us.
If for adults, perhaps things like ‘Crimes Against Logic: Exposing the Bogus Arguments of Politicians, Priests, Journalists, and Other Serial Offenders’ by Jamie Whyte, or ‘Demon-Haunted World’ by Sagan, which is of course, a classic. Or perhaps something like Bill Bryson’s A short History of Nearly Everything which merely celebrates the amazing history of science and learning about everything.
Avoid books that might be misinterpreted as ‘attacking’ any particular issue, other than the way people think about things. I think that’s the best place to start on any of those sorts of things. If the adult that is receiving the book or if they come into the store themselves and they are indicating that perhaps they are open to something a little bit more, then you could perhaps be more direct.
For example, we were holding a ‘Charles Darwin Day’ and some women came into my shop. One of them said “Oh, what are you doing that for, wasn’t he one of the most evil men in history?” These were university-educated, 40-something women, who weren’t particularly religious. They simply had this misconception. So, I handed them both a biography of Charles Darwin, which they devoured in 24 hours and now they run the local non-fiction book-club meet up for women and have recently brought Hitchen’s ‘God Is Not Great’ and a variety of others! They’re amazing – they just devour all the books!
For my own part, this is what I ended up writing to the person from Facebook, and I hope that it’s of use to them – and perhaps to others. Feel free to add your own advice in the comments, as I think this is an ongoing concern for many.
In general, I guess it’s a matter of who is actually able to be spoken to here. And I’d say it’s the father, who allowed the book to be passed on? Am I right in thinking he’s the one you’re related to, and not the children’s mother?
I’d suggest contact him and point out that it wasn’t your intention at all to do the things she accuses you of. Point out that you were hurt and confused, feeling like you were completely out on a limb. It doesn’t matter how angry she was, she had no right to just be that rude. You’re family, and he’d be just as upset if it were YOU who called HER and yelled names at her down the phone, over what was a well-intentioned gift of a Bible or something! In my opinion, it’s somewhat understandable and yet still an over-reaction on her part. It’s entirely likely she’s feeling a little embarrassed about how she behaved, if she reflects upon it!
I’d suggest asking, with his guidance, what you might be able to do to regain contact with the family, even if it means that you agree not to interact with the sister-in-law. I don’t think that it’s likely that you’ll see eye-to-eye on certain topics (of course!) but you can agree not to bring them up.
The fact is, parents are the ones who will have the say over what their young kids will read (as is standard, as they are raising them) – and issues involving science that might challenge their religious views might very well be something that you’ll have to wait over time before you can discuss with them, if at all. Encouraging kids to work hard at school, suggesting non-directly challenging books that promote critical thinking and philosophy in general, may be a better approach. I’d suggest, after this event, running what you’d like to give past both of the parents, pointing out that you only want to do the right thing by them all!
Even if you are worried about how she’s raising them, there’s something that you can certainly do if she is starting to criticise you and your lifestyle around them. Setting a good example in how you live your life is something the kids will observe. Challenging the stereotype that she has in mind is another way, which is something they’ll certainly pick up on.
In the end, it’s a matter of choosing a battle and in this case, it may not be worth fighting if it loses you much-loved family – but you can also quite subtly prove her wrong as well, by being a family member who, on a number of fronts, really should be valued. Even if you do not believe in a religion as they do.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
What a terrible position to be in! You gave good advice though I think.
Quite shocking to think that there could be such an adverse reaction to such a lovely book but I guess for some people evolution is a dirty word and they simply don’t want their children to have a balanced view and eventually make up their own minds. They are pretty insecure about their beliefs if they think that simple information and an alternate view will rip their children away from the family religion. I’m definitely over-simplifying there.
I’m keeping an eye out for children’s literature on evolution for my three growing god-daughters – now there’s a conundrum!
Actually I’m fortunate, although church attending my friends, the girls’ parents – two families, are perfectly happy with evolution. I just want to get the nicest, least patronising book for them. Some children’s books are just awful on any subject.
Another one I’d like to suggest for older kids who get bored with dry fact but love narrative is ‘Sophie’s World’. It’s basically a novel following a young girl (I think she’s 7 or 8? Haven’t read it in while) who receives letters from a correspondance philosophy course. It’s very narrative-heavy but it gives kids something to think on, and some good starting points if they want to get into hardcore philosophy.
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